My First Disappointment

When I first started this journey back in July to get my story published, I was really excited yet incredibly nervous. This would be my first anyone outside of my core group of 2-3 people would read my story and doubts plagued me about whether or not I was good enough. My family have always been supporters of mine, even though I never allowed them to read until recently, so I was excited to get some author copies in order to share with them.

My rule was simple: read the story and leave a note for me then sign it before passing it onto the next person. This way, when I get it back, I’ll have lovely notes from the people I love. The first person I gave the book too was my grandmother. To be fair, she did tell me Fantasy wasn’t her go-to type of book but I still believed she would give it a shot since, in essence, this story was a murder-mystery. On my way back home yesterday, I was talking with my mother. She told me my grandmother couldn’t get past page 10. I felt like such a failure. My own grandmother, an avid reader, hated my story so much she couldn’t finish it.

I wasn’t sure how to feel, and even now I’m conflicted. On one hand, if the story isn’t to your liking you don’t have to read it and I need to be fine with that. On the other, however, you are my grandmother. I would have expected some support, but got none. It was soul crushing, but I have to remember that there are others who enjoyed my story and those are the people I have to focus on, not those who read outside their genre and gave it a chance. The feelings linger, but I cannot let this douse my flame.

-Thank you all.